I have injured myself… again. It is confirmed that I have a tear in my right calf muscle. How bad the tear is we are not yet 100% sure I still need to go for a diagnostic ultrasound so they can see the damage I have done.
In the last 24 hours I have felt a variety of emotions from sadness to anger and then to fear. Last night I was sitting on my couch crying and saying to Mike “Why do I have to strive for greatness, why can’t I just be happy with completing a marathon why is it that I want to train to Boston qualify and to obtain elite status”! I can’t really answer that all I know is I was born with the overachiever gene and I never do anything halfhearted, it is all or nothing.
I tweeted earlier today “There is no injury in mediocrity, why can't I settle for being less than great”, and than I received a tweet from @TheLostGrad “Ain’t no injuries, but there damn sure ain’t no Glory either!!” It was this that made me realize how much of a wimp I am being. Yes I have an injury, is it the end of the world, NO!!
I thought back to Nike’s Find Greatness campaign along with a commercial that was aired at the Olympics this last summer and they made me realize that setback happen, obstacles jump in our way but it how we overcome those obstacles and setbacks that prove if we are truly great or not.
"Now here's the reality of it. You don't want to be walking off with any regrets.
Be annoyed. Go cry. You're on the line between breaking point and breaking through.
In struggle, you'll find strength.
Now get over that line! Dig for that extra inch!
Take the best you can do! And do better!
Every second is a moment in time. But this second is a moment in history."
Last night I felt like my dream to run was Boston was slipping out of my hands. I felt like throwing in the towel and giving up. This morning brought me a fresh new prospective. I might be out for a few weeks I might lose a little bit of my endurance in the short run but in the long run I am going to come back and I am going to come back stronger and faster than ever because there is greatness inside of me and I am not going to allow a little injury get in my way of qualifying for Boston.
I have given myself an hour to grieve over my lost training and my calf and now I am ready to fight, ready to do everything in my power to heal and come back strong.
I have to change up my training a little bit. My physio said once I am healed I will have to reduce mileage and speed for a period of time until I am back to normal but my physio is amazing and has always gotten me back on my feet in better condition than before I started seeing him.
Today I found greatness within myself, greatness that was always there but I didn’t realize was there, today I am a stronger person than I was yesterday.